Another lesson in parenting

      Things I have learned today:

• Sometimes its ok to feel like you want to give up on being a mom (the feeling usually passes pretty quick when the kids turn on their charm).

• 2 year olds can in fact hear you when you speak to them but lack the ability to respond unless it involves chocolate, candy or some other treat.

• Babies give the best kisses, its even better if they don't have teeth yet or else you become their chew toy.

• You know you are doing a good job when your 6 year old tells says you are the best mom in the entire world ever and she is glad you are her Mommy.

• Your heart can in fact melt.  It happens immediately when your toddler says please kiss me more, I love it. It makes me happy, does it make you happy too Mommy?

• Kids are the greatest blessing in life ( I already knew this but sometimes you forget).

The Waiting Game

     Lately, it feels like we are stuck in a holding pattern, always waiting for something. Waiting until Camden sleeps through the night, for the kids to get over their colds, for my birthday, the next step in Mike's divorce papers and the worst, to say Goodbye to a loved one.

      I am not a great "waiter".  I am impatient and Mike will be the first one to tell you this. I can't even wait until I get home to break into my drive-thru bag.  I generally want it now! The only place I have true patience, is with the kids and lately even that is wearing thin.  I guess maybe I am just worn out in general, although after last nights 8 hours of sleep I do feel much better ( Before you all start cheering Camden spent another night at Mike's Parents so I could sleep, but Harmony only woke up once so I guess go ahead and cheer).

     I often find myself saying "I can't wait until...Harmony can fit into...Camden can ...Ella will..." It always makes me feel sad afterwards though, like I am rushing time, which when it pertains to the kids I wish would just slow down. Then there are times, like now when the waiting is an unbearable torture of sorts. Waiting to say goodbye to someone you know and love and your family loves. You don't want them to go because it hurts your heart to think of life with out them here but watching them suffer hurts worse.  So you hold their hand, smile and pray for a peacefulness and all the while waiting...  

    Waiting does cultivate patience and I guess that is what I am learning. To be more patient. To relax, take life as it comes.  Mikes divorce will happen SOMETIME and soon after we will get married. To stop rushing the kids.  Camden will potty train when he wants to why rush him being a baby, I doubt he will stay in diapers forever.  Its not going to hurt anyone for a few more weeks (maybe my mommy ego because I am not super mom that trained their 1 year old but I'm tough my ego can take it and sancta-mommies can shove it).  We can get so wrapped up in the "waiting game" that we forget to live in the here and now. So I am trying to be more patient, live life as it comes and relax.  What is life trying to teach you this week?

And Now Back to Reality...

     Today the Holidays are officially over for us.  Ella has gone to her Dad's to spend her remaining time off of school with them.  Mike goes back to work today and on afternoons of course.  The kids and I get to resume normal life.
     We had a fun family centered holiday and we all really wish it wasn't over yet but all good things must come to an end sometime (I really wish that saying didn't exist). Ours ends today.

     Some fun things have happened over the course of our holiday time and in no specific order I will try and catch up about all the exciting and funny things that happened. An upcoming week of blog catch up I suppose which is much better than a week of blog ketchup (yes, I am still very much sleep deprived, hence my stupidity).

     So you can look forward to hearing all about our favourite Christmas gifts, Harmony turning 7 Months and the day Mike went out to buy a few groceries and came back with something that was not edible and 50". 
     I hope everyone had a Very Merry Christmas and the beginning of a great New Year to come.  See you back here tomorrow.

Thank God She's Cute!

     My Sunday evening plans were foiled by a 6 month old.  I watch one hour of TV a week..Just one measly hour ( more like 45 minutes since there is no commercials) of one show I enjoy watching.  I really don't think its too much to ask to have one hour to sit and enjoy the feel of sitting back in the recliner and just vegging.  Apparently it is and definitely if you have been looking forward to it all week long. 

   Harmony is a sneaky little bugger. She went to sleep around 8:30 and since Ella was in bed and asleep shortly after 8 so I was ecstatic.  Well Harmony must have heard Camden wasn't going to be home to occupy mommy's time and cause trouble so she decided she couldn't be outdone by Camden, time to raise a little hell. She had a 20 minute cat nap and then proceeded to cry, fuss, giggle and play until 11:30 pm and in the process I only got to watch snippets of my show...and I missed the end...the big shocker to finish off the season. 

     I tried putting her to bed but she just screamed and freaked out.  I would pick her up to try and feed,burp, change, bounce , rock or snuggle her and her eyes would pop open and she was all bright eyed and smiling.  How can you be mad with those big blue eyes and cute grin staring back. 

     So all in all, because I love Harmony more than a shocking season finale of Dexter, I missed it.  I have however promised that as long as she shall live in our house I will make her miss the last 15 minutes of every show that has any significance to her. Nope, see I am not bitter at all.  Times like this my favourite saying is well Thank God she's cute, especially since I just laid her down for her morning nap with out so much as a peep out of her.

(Photo Courtesy Of Amy V)

Poop Surprise

   I have been getting hit hard on the poop front lately and frankly, I am kind of sick of all the crap...literally.   Not mine, I know when I have to go and thankfully I have been potty trained for 24 years.  

  Harmony the once a week pooper (yes, its completely normal for breast fed babies to only poop once a week) has started eating real food and well with real food comes a whole lot of poop.  I am constantly being well, surprised with what we call around here little poop surprises.  You know the kind where it hides in the back so when you open the diaper, you think you are in the clear and you pull that diaper off and suddenly surprise there is poo and now its everywhere and it didn't even stink like poo, how is that possible.  Of course there are like only 2 wipes left in the container and if you had of smelled poo you would have grabbed more. *sigh* Now there is a poo mess to clean and usually you are alone so its up to you.

    Camden is even worse for the "Poop Surprise".  He knows he did it but generally won't tell you  and it doesn't always stink either. I have been changing him standing up if its just pee so I can get him to sit on the potty.  This ends disastrously because well then you get little Poop Surprises all over the floor.  Camden think its extra hilarious and yells "Poop Surprise, I surprised you".  Never a good surprise.

     Camden also surprised me the other day by leaving a trail across the dining room floor.  It looked like the Easter Bunny had hit us up early.  I was trying the bottomless potty training method and lets just say it wasn't a huge hit.  I am not a big fan of almost stepping in poo or cleaning it up off the floor.

     Anyone else get hit with the good old Poop Surprise? Make me feel better and tell me some of your funny Poop Surprise stories...about your kids, not really into adult poop surprise stories...they aren't nearly as cute.

Not so Wordless Wednesday - Christmas Picture Outtakes

The kids can't always look super freakin' adorable, after all they are kids so enjoy these outtakes from our family Christmas Pictures

First of all they are suckers not smoking cigarettes...That's just silly they are in our dining room, we would never allow them to smoke in the house.  I'm kidding, Well not really...they really are suckers, but lets go with they aren't allowed to smoke at all. We decided this picture was so cute even though it wasn't a planned picture, it captures their personalities.

Mother of the Year goes to me of course, for allowing their baby to chew on Christmas lights while they were plugged in.  I should have at least unplugged them first because you know wires with sharp pointy pieces of glass are an excellent first choice for cutting those teeth, cutting get it...yeah I'm tired this morning.  I did take them out of her mouth right away, I promise.

Seriously Mom?! Matching PJ's and wrapped in Tinsel? This is embarrassing.

Maybe Mom won't notice I am being a brat if I smile this exceptionally cute smile?

He's Choking Me, Stop Him...please...*whine, whine, whine*

Oh come on suck it up, at least he is still smiling, if you would too these would be cute...FINE, CAMDEN YOU ARE HURTING YOUR SISTER STOP NOW!

     Well, there you have it folks, a few outtakes from our lovely Christmas pictures.  If you have kids you know how hard it is to get them all to look, smile and act appropriately well trying to obtain lasting memories.  You are lucky to walk away with one usable shot, children intact and a voice, if you haven't lost it from all the screaming (One more pic, I swear if you don't sit still smile blah blah blah NO PRESENTS EVER) 

     Have a lovely, safe and happy day today.  Don't forget to smile and enjoy the remaining few days until Christmas.  See you back here tomorrow.

We are SUCKY Free!

     Last week I was sick. The whining around here was unbearable and it was mostly coming from me.  I was having a hard time dealing with it all while Mike worked the afternoon shift.  Really I hate when he is gone from 2-11:30.  It really does make for a long day.

    Lately Camden has gone for the occasional bedtime sucky user to a full time junkie. It was driving me crazy.  He would wander around all day whining, begging, crying for a fix. "I want my sucky, I need my sucky, where is my sucky, SUCKY NOW!" I got sick of him acting like a addict.  I was beyond frustrated and well Daddy is too soft hearted to be the bad guy.  Daddy was a Camden -Sucky enabler.  It had to go.  In a fit of desperation and less than no patience I swapped his good suckys for his old suckys and grabbed the scissors (Good suckys were stashed high in the cupboard in case this plan backfired and mommy gave in).  Camden was of course in full out meltdown mode but that wasn't stopping me, this had to end now.  His endless whining was making me a little bit insane, OK a whole lot insane. 

     Scissors in hand I proceeded to cut up his sucky's in front of him.  Judge away, but it worked.  He was mad for maybe an hour but likely less, it just felt like an hour.  He asked about his sucky only 2 more times in 3 days. I consider that success. 

    We made a huge deal about what a big boy he is and he asked for some big boy LEGO.  We were more than happy to oblige the poor little guy.  I feel bad for snatching away his beloved sucky but seriously the whining was beyond terrible. 

    We are now sucky free and happy.  The next battle potty training. Stay tuned.

Weekend Wrap up - Healthy- ish

     I am glad to report that I am healthy again.  I think Little Miss Harmony is feeling much better as well and Camden seems to be fine so far.  Mike, well poor Mike isn't feeling so hot.  He isn't sick but he is a little achy and a bit weak.  I sure hope he doesn't get the full illness because nothing is worse than the Man-Cold. 

     We enjoyed a quieter weekend filled with family birthdays, a family dinner and lots of LEGO building. 

     I would love to kiss whoever invented LEGO, unless they are deceased because you know I am not really into that type of thing.  Call me crazy but decomposition isn't really one of my turn ons but enough about that.  LEGO has captured the hearts of 2 out of 3 little people in this house and well 2 big people as well.  We have discovered that its a huge motivator in this house, so we have been working on a certain little guy's potty training or well lack there of. We also used it as a motivator for another huge success in this house over the weekend but more about that tomorrow.

     Overall, a good weekend spent with great people. It's great to be feeling better so that I can catch up on all the stuff I missed before, like the eleventy billion loads of laundry to be put away.  Yes, I know eleventy billion isn't a real number but it describes perfectly the amount of clean laundry that is heaped on the laundry room floor just begging to be folded and put away.  Ella's room also needs a good once over, well more like twice or three times over, my that child can create disaster in 10 seconds flat.  She claims her room threw up, cute right? Yeah not so much when its me cleaning it.  Good thing I have Christmas and LEGO as a motivator.

      I hope everyone had a relaxing, healthy and happy weekend.  Don't forget to come back tomorrow to read all about Camden's big boy achievement that earned him some big boy Toy Story 3 LEGO.

Privacy... Oh how I miss you!

      I love, love, love being a mom but sometimes I wished someone had prepared me a little more for the complete lack of privacy.  It's one of those things they forget to mention in all those pregnancy books that are supposed to prepare you for motherhood.  At least a heads up from some of the mothers out there would have been appreciated.   A little warning perhaps, so you can mentally prepare yourself for say the next....oh right, rest of your life of never, ever, ever having a private moment to yourself again. 

     It really starts before the baby is born.  Plenty of doctors appointments where you are poked, prodded and asked to undress, pee in a cup and have your belly man handled and measured on a frequent basis.  Its all for the health of you and your precious unborn baby, so its all worth it but it's annoying none the less.
     
     The whole birthing process is amazing, but during which any shred of privacy you have managed to  maintain up until this point will be completely gone.  By the time the baby has made its grand entrance, everyone in the entire world has seen your bits or at least it feels like this and you know what you really don't care anymore.  You just pushed out a the most beautiful human being out of your own body and you are a freaking super hero.  You really don't care who saw what and don't worry your privacy will be invaded a 1000 more times before you leave the hospital. They check you a billion times to make sure you are healing, that the little monster that just split you end to end is latching properly. The good news is that if it would have embarrassed you before you were a mom, it doesn't bother you now.

     Once you have a child or children be prepared to never again pee or shower in peace, EVER! Once they are old enough to not follow you everywhere, don't worry they still will. If you ignore them they will just talk louder through the door, shove stuff under the door or bang on the door so much that you may as well just left it open. If you haven't become a mom yet, savour every long shower and pee break like its your last because before you know it you won't have time to do either and if by some miracle you get a chance, most likely you will be toting a baby with you.

    As a parent you may as well forget ever having a private conversation as well.  I would truly love to have a conversation with anyone really that I don't have to worry about it being repeated by a toddler or told to a teacher at school. Like the day I told Ella that its too  darn bad that the teacher wants you to take a litter less lunch on your field trip because I don't care what your teacher says you are getting what you get.  Mommy doesn't have time to take out all your food and repack it.  I have a hungry newborn and a sick toddler, be thankful you are getting food at all. Yep, first thing she told her teacher when she got to school that day.  I didn't even feel bad though, after all I did have a newborn less than 2 weeks old and a sick toddler who was in and out of the ER 3-4 times that week. 


     Oh and bedroom privacy which is non existent since toddlers don't knock and don't care whether you are changing and have company over which you would prefer not see you naked.  They don't care if they interrupt your alone time with Daddy even though they are supposed to be sleeping but can't because they like Mommy's bed better.  Camden shared our bed for the first 2 years of his life, I am amazed we actually had another baby.

     I almost forgot that there is also phone calls, mail, email - all listened in to, then questioned about - who, why, where what, when and how, opened and read before you get a chance, checked without your knowledge same with facebook.  Smart 6 year olds are sometimes a curse and have the ability to make you feel like the child.

      So let me give you this gentle reminder as a sort of duty, to all people who have yet to have children.  Not to scare you off because truly you would be missing out on the best thing life has to offer but more as a reminder to enjoy every private moment, telephone conversation, letter, potty break and shower.  Once these little monsters blessings enter your life it will be a very long time until privacy is restored.  Enjoy it well you still can, trust me, you will look back fondly on the times you could pee alone with out a toddler trying to help you wipe.

Tiny conspirators

      My kids have it in for me.  Call me crazy but Mike will agree they have been plotting.  Of course, not my Ella though.  Ella, my kind and gentle little soul is too sweet to give her Momma such a hard time.  The little two on the other hand, don't let their cuteness fool you. 

     You may have recently heard about the shortage of sleep around here lately.  It begins the moment my head hits the pillow.  I hear the first cries of the evening.  I get up feed baby or console toddler and crawl back in bed.  It will take no longer than a minute for the other child to start up.  I deal with the other child, then once again get back into my warm comfy bed.  I may squeeze a few minutes rest in and finally get to the stage where you are just dozing off and then it starts all over again.  Repeat all night and you get the kind of sleep deprivation I am dealing with.

     I have tried going to bed early to trick them.  No such luck. They know and the whole process starts even earlier.  Going to bed later results in even less sleep.  I am at a loss.  How do I get more sleep?  I could nap but that doesn't always work. 

   Well off I go to down large amount of caffeine to keep this days on track.  I can already feel myself dragging and its going to be a busy day.  Any coping strategies? A few sleep tricks to share?

The Boy that Breaks my Heart

     Camden told me he didn't love me today.  He loves his daddy, sisters, dog and backhoes, not mommy.  Actually he doesn't like me.  I have to be OK with this but I will admit it hurts a little bit.

    He is going through a Daddy phase ( I hope its a phase).  First thing in the morning he screams for Daddy or if he is being his typical funny self he asks for Michael.  Daddy plays, wrestles and gives in to all his demands.  Maybe because I am trying to potty train him, make him give up his suckys or bottles or maybe its because I am busy with the Baby a lot.  Who knows?

     This wee sweet boy wipes off my kisses and breaks my heart.  He screams at me and it really doesn't matter what I am asking him.  He does the exact opposite of whatever I say.  I now only ask him the opposite of what I want him to do (Don't sit on your chair and don't eat your food) and it works because he refuses to do what I ask.  He tells me to go away.  He won't hug or kiss me either.  He won't even play with me or let me watch a show with him unless I'm the only one home and even then not all the time.

     I know its a temporary thing but I secretly hope he's a Momma's boy.  I don't think he will be though.  He never really has been.  He refused to even acknowledge my presence until he was 18 months old and finally decided he would call me Mama. I can dream though right, after all its me that gets up with him a million times a night, changes his bum and gets his food. I bathe him, wash his clothes and clean up his messes.  He owes me right?

     Am I alone on this? Is he the only one who is like this? He can't be the only stubborn one out there.

The Fun Mom

     I've really tried to be the "fun" Mom lately.  I'm sure you know her.  She is the one that does a million crafts with paints, glue and glitter in every colour.  She bakes cookies, cakes and muffins just for fun  Everything is a hands on learning experience with her kids and she does it all in her perfectly coordinated apron. 
    
     I've tried really hard this week to be "that" mom. Every supper has been home made from scratch with the kids helping.  We also managed to make sugar cookies with sprinkles and icing and home made apple sauce.

       The kids cry, beg, whine to help and how can you deny those sweet little faces, after all they are only little once.  If you don't teach them how to do these things then who will. Its a responsible mothers job to help them learn or thats what I keep telling myself, anyway. To be honest though, lets face it, you want them to remember they had this awesome, fun mom, who always did a crap load of stuff with them. 

     You get half way through the most amazing fun activity ever because you are the most amazing mommy in the whole entire  world ever and they are M.I.A. You find yourself standing alone in the middle of a what looks to be a war zone.  They have gone on to bigger and brighter things, usually the tv because they are "bored" and "this part isn't very fun after all".   I usually start off with a "Life isn't always fun" speech and end up somewhere along the lines of "Get back here dammit! We are making family memories. So you better enjoy it...Oh look smile for the Camera and pretend you are having fun." *Click, flash* Ok fine go watch TV, it's faster and less messy if you don't help anyway.

     I think I still qualify for being the fun mom right? I let them try! Its not my fault they have the attention span of a flea. Please tell me I am not alone on this one?!?!

The Perfect Parent

     How Many times have you ever said, "Oh, My kid would NEVER do that" and how many times has Karma, divine intervention or whatever you happen to believe in, has come right back to bite you in the butt. Never, you say, then you are either not a parent or a big fat liar.  I was in fact the "Perfect Parent" before I had kids.   I have learned as a parent or just as a person in general to Never say Never, you don't know what the future holds.

     Here are some of my favourites, that I personally have regretted saying:

• My kids will never, ever share my bed  - Camden spent the first 2.5 years of his life there out of sheer desperation on my part and the fact that I was less likely to drop him off on someones doorstep  anonymously if I had at least a few minutes sleep here and there.

• I will never let myself "go" after I have kids. - Yep, OK because showering every 3rd day is totally acceptable, along with PJ's stained with breast milk , overgrown eyebrows and legs so hairy they could be confused with a yeti's . I am happy to report after 5 months I am somewhat starting to care about myself again.

• My kids will behave in public and know who is boss. -Oh, they know alright...and it's not me and public tantrums are at an all time low, mainly because we hardly venture out in public anymore, its easier to control the chaos at home, in their native habitat.

• I will never bribe my children. - Bribery is a necessary parenting tool, I don't care what anyone says we have all done it and do it.  If your child behaves, is toilet trained, eats dinner, behaves, goes to bed, cleans up or behaves you most likely have bribed them.  Sometimes the treat, sticker, pennies are easier than dealing with a full on melt down in the middle of church, crowded doctors office, the middle of the mall etc.

• My kid will not have sugar (juice, pop, candy, cookies etc).   - Definitely, as long as we lived in a cave somewhere I am sure we could have managed that one.  Moderation is key.

• I will not drive my child around in the car at 2 am to get them to sleep.  - Camden, Colic, Chronic Ear Infections...'nuff said.

     Being perfect is over rated anyway! Sometimes to be the perfect parent you have to realize you are in fact imperfect, which makes us better.  I strive everyday to be just a little better than I was the day before, a little more patient, a little more strict about somethings, a little more lenient about others, a little more understanding and a better parent, but never will I strive to be perfect.  What works for you, doesn't always work for someone else, or even work for you later on. 

     What are somethings you said you would NEVER EVER do when you were a parent?  I am curious.  I can't be the only one that my pre-baby parenting beliefs have come back to haunt them. The perfect parent pffffffft.  Its a myth.  There is no such thing.